Art Buchwald and me

Sherman R. Frederick/Properly Subversive

Those of a certain vintage will know the name Art Buchwald. A Pulitzer Prize winning newspaper columnist for the Washington Post, he was widely syndicated into hundreds of newspapers. 

In the 1940s, he was a correspondent in Paris and knew Hemmingway and that crew, which I find utterly fascinating. But he made his journalism bones as a satirist in the 1960s, pricking the administrations of Lyndon B. Johnson and Richard M. Nixon. 

Johnson became so frustrated at Buchwald’s ribbing of LBJ’s handling of the VietNam War, he put Buchwald under FBI surveillance.

In one of his more memorable columns, Buchwald offered his solution curbing gun violence. 

“The constitution gives everyone the right to bear arms. But there is nothing that says an American has to have ten fingers.”

He suggested Americans have their trigger fingers snipped off.

Anyway, this is a roundabout way to tell you that as a young newsman I actually met Art Buchwald at a conference of newspaper editors in Washington, D.C.

I don’t remember what he spoke about that day. But he did, in fact, seek me out in the crowd and ask me a question. I remember it clearly.

As I stood in the exit aisle after his speech, he grabbed my arm and said: “Excuse me, son, can you let me by?” Wow. What a thrill. 

As he passed, being the trained journalist that I am, I noticed something odd about Mr. Buchwald – he had massive tufts of hair growing out of his ears. 

“That’s a lot of hair,” I said to myself. “Does that happen to all old people?”

I’m approaching half-a-century older now. I know first hand about ear hair. But I shall never forget who first brought it to my attention – none other than the legendary American writer Art Buchwald.

(For those interested in learning more on Buchwald, there’s a relatively new book out titled “Funny Business: The Legendary Life and Political Satire of Art Buchwald.” You can find it on Amazon.)

CHILI ‘N CORNBREAD

A blurb crossed my computer recently. It was from an Episcopal church I occasionally frequent advertising a dinner upcoming for its pledge campaign. It said: “Experience the perfect pairing of food and fellowship” – chili and cornbread.

Chili and cornbread? The perfect pairing? 

Bold words from those “all things in moderation Episcopalians.” I certainly won’t deny that chili and cornbread make a damn fine combination, especially if Hatch green chili is involved. 

But I’ve been to some fine church meals over my time. More than I can count in Las Vegas. Some in New Mexico and some in Hawaii. A Lutheran feast in Pacifica, California, featured some excellent smoked sausage and coffee, strong and black, the way good Lutherans tend to make it, along with a live jazz combo. I was also at one in Guam that featured roasted fruit bat, which I didn’t eat, thank you very much. 

I am going to say, however, that if I had to settle on the perfect church food pairing, I’d have to go with one of those Southern Baptist potlucks with multiple variations of the iconic green bean casserole and fried chicken.

Not that there’s anything wrong with chili and cornbread. Just sayin’ if I had to sit through another church pledge campaign speech … 

ONE MORE THING

– Bathroom hand dryers are amazing if you want to kill a few minutes before wiping your hands on your pants. 

Thanks again for reading another edition of Sun City Life. Until next month, avoid sore heads, laugh a little and always question authority. 

(Sherman R. Frederick is a longtime Nevada newspaperman and writer. He is a member of the Nevada Press Association Hall of Fame. He can be reached at shermfrederick@gmail.com.)